After our positive first scan, I began to relax a little bit, however the sickness was getting worse. This was good thing though, as it helped my mind to think that everything was still ok. I worried on the odd days where I felt ok, but the sickness always came back, without fail!
I felt comfortable enough to make my first (and only) purchase so far – this pregnancy planner from Kikki-k. It has a diary, shopping lists, to do lists, a spot to record a birth plan, and even feeding and sleep records for once bubs is born! It goes with me everywhere.
The weeks slowly ticked by. I negotiated with work to work part time hours until I felt better. My mornings were horrible but I picked up (with the help of medication) in the afternoons. I was starting to feel better about the viability of the pregnancy after we passed the point where we lost bubs last time. Then I started spotting again at 10 weeks.
It was heavier than the first time but still no pain or cramps. I went back to the doctor once again to ask for a check up scan. My nuchal scan was still over 2 weeks away and I didn’t want to be hanging on to the anxiety for that long. The doctor wasn’t concerned about the spotting, but he was very sympathetic to my situation and gave me a referral. I was able to get in the same day. Damian was away for work and I didn’t want to go alone so I asked my mum to come with me. Again, I was nervous heading into the scan, and again I was afraid to look. Surely the worst had happened again.
But I need not have worried. My little blob had a strong heartbeat and had even grown arms and legs! The technician was great and said she sees it all the time. It is most often the uterus lining being dislodged by the growing placenta. Most people just reabsorb it, but for some people like me it comes out. Once again I was relieved. What a roller coaster!
And so the sickness continued. As did the anxiety every time I had a good day. Soon enough I was at 12 weeks and it was time for the magic 12 week scan. I felt more confident going into this one. I didn’t even close my eyes! On the screen we saw what was finally starting to look like a baby! We could see fingers and toes beginning to form. He/she was doing somersaults and waving. The right bits were in the right spots and everything was measuring on time. We were excited to finally announce to our extended family and friends!